This or That: The Music Edition

OK, so it occurs to me that the occasional person stumbles into this neck of the online woods because they know me, but they haven't seen me for the better part of several decades for one reason or another.

Anyway, while not necessarily being a fan of the whole meme concept, there is one that I filled out a couple of years ago that might (but probably doesn't) shed a little more light onto what I've been doing with as a "grown-up" to this point. (Yeah, I laugh when I think about me as a "grown-up" too...)

That said...

1. The Beatles or The Rolling Stones?
I once referred to The Beatles as an "overachieving Liverpudlian skiffle group," a phrase that earned me a certain measure of respect from a huge Beatles fan and pop genius in his own right who shall remain nameless. That said, I also once turned down a $5 front row ticket to see the Stones at Vanderbilt.

2. Queen or The Eagles?
'Tis far better to hear a drunken karaoke version of "Bohemian Rhapsody" than to hear a group of drunken rednecks try to harmonize on "Seven Bridges Road."

3. Ozzy or Dio?
Pre-MTV badass Ozzy? Yes. Drunken buffoon "father of the year" Ozzy? Pass.

4. Iron Maiden or Judas Priest?
Priest.

5. Jimi Hendrix or Stevie Ray Vaughn?
SRV. I'm from Texas, sue me. The night before my last two finals in college, SRV was playing in my little college hick town. I weighed the two choices: "study" or "Stevie." I studied. Four months later, he's dead. I wish I'd gone to the show. I'd still have my degree *and* a kick-ass musical memory.

6. The Beach Boys or The Monkees?
I'm sayin' Monkees because (a) I can name all of them without thinkin' hard and (b) if I know what's good for me in the sweet lovin' department.
(Editor's note: this *was* from late 2005. Not sure if my latest attachment has a Monkees fascination or not...)

7. Steve Vai, Yngwie Malmsteen or Joe Satriani?
I'm going to continue to give Casey the respect he deserves for the following phrase: "That's like choosing between syphilis, gonorrhea, and herpes."

8. Led Zeppelin or The Who?
Tough call, but I'm goin' with The Who. As Pete Townshend would say, "Whad' you say...?"

9. Pink Floyd or Yes?
The third and fourth CDs I ever bought were Yes' "90125" and "Big Generator."

10. Queensryche or Rush?
Rush, simply because Geddy Lee guest-starred on the Bob and Doug McKenzie album...

11. Lynyrd Skynyrd or Creedence Clearwater Revival (CCR)?
Personal rule: No Skynyrd before 10pm. It's just safer that way. And what's up with Nashville crowds freakin' the freak out everytime "Sweet Home Alabama" starts up at a ballgame? I'll never figure that out.

12. KISS or AC/DC?
AC/DC never had a disco hit.

13. Nirvana or Pearl Jam?
Like it or not, "Smells Like Teen Spirit" changed everything.

14. Favorite Member of the Beatles?
Stu Sutcliffe

15. Favorite Member of the Who?
Thunderfingers. Entwhistle played a club gig in Nashville, and you could hear his soundcheck from outside...three blocks away.

16. Dark Side of the Moon or The Wall?
All in all, you're just another...band whose legend far outpaces your work.

17. Guns N' Roses or Motley Crue?
GnR, if only for the first few bars of "Sweet Child of Mine." How's that Chinese Democracy record coming along, Axl?
(Editor's note: Almost three years later, still no sign.)

18. Ratt or Quiet Riot?
Bang your head...metal health will drive you mad.

19. Bob Dylan or Eric Clapton?
Dylan, if only for "Blonde on Blonde" and "Live 1968." Now, though, just painful to try to listen to live. Willie Nelson kicked his posterior all over their joint minor league stadium tour.

20. Hair Metal or Heavy Metal?
Two very different sides of the '80s music coin. And it's a coin I spent a long time ago.

21. The Clash or The Sex Pistols?
The only band that matters.

22. The Mars Volta or Coheed & Cambria?
I reviewed the latest Mars Volta record last year, and it's an hour or so of my life I'll never get back. The others by default.

23. Black Sabbath or Deep Purple?
I have nothing to say about either band that is either relevant or true.

24. Randy Rhoads or Zack Wylde?
I have a lot of respect for Zack Wylde, but Rhoads was also a member of Quiet Riot. So there.

25. Aerosmith or Bon Jovi?
Aerosmith wins by a nose, simply because they brought Run DMC to a larger audience.

26. David Lee Roth or Sammy Hagar?
Sammy and Dave toured together a few years back. Sammy, who'd been playing with his band The Waboritas for several years at that point, delivered a tight, rockin' set that had the crowd on its feet the whole time. Dave, who'd hired the best Van Halen cover band he could find, opened with "Panama" and "Hot For Teacher" and lost the crowd's interest three songs in. Not sayin' Dave (or more precisely, the VH material he was on) was bad...I'm just sayin' Sammy's better. And you can threaten to kick my ass over this all you want...many have tried, all have failed.

27. Van Halen or Def Leppard?
Van Halen. Gary Cherone, however, is best left unmentioned.

28. Brian Johnson or Bon Scott?
Coin flip. Gotta love a guy who's official coroner's report reads "drank himself to death." But Brian Johnson is the voice of "Back In Black." I abstain.

29. Velvet Revolver or Audioslave?
Thing is, I was never a huge fan of any of the four bands that were distilled down to these two. Probably have to lean toward Audioslave on the point of pure musicianship.

30. Grace Slick or Janis Joplin?
Grace Slick wasn't even the best female singer in her band...that honor would have to go to Mickey Thomas.

31. Woodstock or Ozzfest?
Nope. Nein. No. Next.

32. Elton John or Billy Joel?
Billy Joel circa "Glass Houses." After that, I've no need for either.

33. Journey or Foreigner?
Strangely enough, I'm going with Foreigner. "Double Vision" is an underappreciated album.

34. Kazaa or Napster?
Direct Connect

35. Beastie Boys or Run DMC?
Who's house? Run's House!

36. Cinderella or Whitesnake?
Saw 'em both on the same bill in 1985. The headliner that night? Quiet Riot.

37. U2 or REM?
My only musical mark-out moment of 2005 came in Chicago the split-second "Vertigo" started at the United Center.

38. Motorhead or Metallica?
Both have done "Enter Sandman"...

39. Dream Theater or King Crimson?
My most favorite interview of 2005? Adrian Belew.

40. Boston or Blue Oyster Cult?
When I moved to Nashville, you could count on hearing at least one Boston song per day on 103-KDF. That said, I've got a fever...

41. The Cure or The Smiths?
Pass the razor blades, please...

42. Tom Petty or Dire Straits?
Petty is one of the most quietly charismatic frontmen you'll ever see. That said, "Sultans of Swing" is one of my top five songs of all time...

43. Jethro Tull or The Doors?
The winner of the first-ever Grammy for heavy metal? Tull, thus cementing forever the Grammys lack of relevance.

44. Poison or the Scorpions?
Greatest "Behind The Music" quote ever: "It went from the House of Whores to the House of Horrors." God love C.C. Deville.

45. Skid Row or Twisted Sister?
Twisted Sister, if only because Dee Snider had to testify before Congress.

46. Smashing Pumpkins or Radiohead?
Put it this way...if there had been no Radiohead, there'd be no Coldplay. And the world would be a better place for it.

47. Kansas or Nazareth?
"I heard a man saying something..."

48. ZZ Top or Blackfoot?
ZZ Top. I have the keychain to prove it.

49. Steve Miller Band or Marshall Tucker Band?
Steve Miller Band right up until "Abracadabra".

50. Ted Nugent or Peter Frampton?
For the life of me, I'll never figure out how Nuge hooked up with Jack Blades from Night Ranger and Tommy Shaw from Styx to form Damn Yankees. "Frampton Comes Alive"...overrated to be sure. But Frampton was also the music director/coach for the band Stillwater in "Almost Famous," and that redeems him greatly in my eyes.